ello..
i know this kind of long.. but its all true arites.. lately its wat i feel..
PART I: WHY M I BEING THIS WAY
What the meaning of me here..Sick and tired of being unappreciated!.. Its better im off this way, there no use of me standing here... wat for??... When i feel unappreciated at all... I feel its better im off this way... REally 2 Sick and tired of unappreciated.. =( When im standing here and look at the city...My heart just feel the greatness of loneliness that standing straight... I just a loner, No one know what im going thru..Even though i share wat the used?!... i can feel that im becoming bad gal!!!!... Nw feelin like wantd to go d..... N tat it just be bad, Whats the point being good n u r not feet appreciated, its better i be bad, atleast i know no one care,there so dark heart in me till i cant pull old me back... i m so heartless!!..
Haix... I go thru alot of sadness n cryness, i guess its time for me to goes deeper changes!.. i guess no one cld help me now!.. i was drown alone in my black heart.. i cant cry anymore, there no more tears left in me.. if i got back.. that all the coz of a black heart in me.. if i had to change old me, theres alot of path that i have f gone thru , but i guess it, juz impossible... old me f gone.. im change damn far!..
From Silient of me and cheerful.. till the lost in me that too far for me to turn back..Even i turn down on many ppl... i wont balme them for ignoring me bcoz whu can tolerate a person like me?.. I can feel a wind is accompany by my side whenever or whatever im at!... Haix, there nothing cld be done as it alredi fate.. All euphoria(happiness) in me have gone.. and old nana have gone for good.. IM NOT EMO!, but its all true.. When im in the city i feel that im smaller than any other else...
PART II: Over me again??!!!
ello..
from bad to...
Even Worsed!.. when my closed fren Sufian have quarrel with his GF over me!!...
I cant get it why does ppl alwaes jealous of me?.. it was a wrong if i be closed to my friend that already got theirselve a stead?... If NOT!!.. WHY... WHY... WHY!!!!.... , why must they quarrel over me?... I tiring to be nice and help ppl that needs me.. and when i help them.. i was the one at risk!!!... PPL pls understand i got NO MORE Friends.. who r there.. they r the one i have.. i cant stand it anymore.. when ppl quarrell in their relationship is over me!!!... I can feel instead of being a helper.. i can feel that i bcoming a relationship rottener!!!!... I have faced this not onlly with this fren but several already... Haix.. God If this keep happening.. i guess i have to fuck off from everybody lifes!!, i will be alone... and let me contd new my life alone without frens... i cant stand all this.. im happi to see my fren happy in their relationship and i just wanted abit of thier smile of happiness to be shared with me.. if i the coz or their sadness it better i don't be here anymore.... I m sorry friends.. i been crying and tired to look for other way for solution.. but i guess maybe i will go on with being alone.. if there no way out for me... Now i guess no one can help me after all.. I prefer being alone searching myself my own happiness... I know my life alone wld be a horrible thing its just like i surrender myself to the wild..
Nana
aka
black heart!
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